怒らなくなったらハッピーに～❤

いつも笑顔で幸せそうに見えるとよく言われますが、

昔からそうだったわけではありません。

毎日怒ってばかりいた私がアメリカから届いたテープを聞いて決心しました。

もっと愛に満ちた人になる！　と。

私の人生にもっと愛を～

I want to have more love in my life. 

私の人生を変えてくれたカセットテープについての話です。

うまく伝わるかわかりませんが、動画と英語のスクリプトをシェアします。

 

 

簡単に内容をお話すると

なぜ、人は「怒る」ということを繰り返すのだろう？

怒るときは、相手が悪いと思いがちだけれど、

実は問題は相手にあるのではなく、自分の中にあるのだと。

相手が自分のやってほしいことをやってくれるから好きなのは本当の愛ではない。

相手が自分に不都合なことをしたときでも相手のことを思いやれるのが本当の愛（REAL LOVE)

一箇所 手を見て話しているところは、前のスピーカーが言った

Stop　Think　 and Reply というキーメッセージを急遽入れたところです。

（これはCall backと言ってスピーチにユーモアを取り入れる方法の一つです）

 

多少スピーチと違うところもあるかもしれませんが、こちらが英語のスクリプトです。

 

Real love

The other day I was on a train. A young American guy got in.

His girlfriend was on the platform.

They were looking at each other as if there were nobody else  in the world.

When the door closed, I saw her lips moving. I love you! “ I love you!“

How romantic ! It made me smile because I knew like cherry blossoms, it won’t last long.

Toastmaster of the day, members and welcome guests.

Romantic love is different from real love. Is your life filled with love?

When I was about 40 years old. My life was not filled with love. It was filled with anger, frustration, and disappointment.

I was teaching English. I spent so much time preparing for the class but students didn’t.

“How come they study harder?”

My son was a teenager, and he was always talking back to me.

His favorite phrase was

“ Who cares! “

My husband never helped me  at home. 

I was not  happy lucky Martha. I was unhappy angry Martha.

Then one day I received a small package from my American friend.

It was a tape. It was a recording of a sermon of her church. It says” Real love”

I started listening to it. There was a soft music and meditation.

Boring!

I don’t have time for this!  Get to the point. I skipped it.

Then there was a voice of a man. He was interesting. I kept listening, and listening, and listening.

When the tape was over, all my anger was washed away. I felt so peaceful.

My heart was filled with love. Would you like to hear what he said?

He talked about anger.

He said, every time we get angry at someone, we feel less happy and our relationships suffer every single time , yet we get angry again the next time.

Why do we do that ? Why do we keep doing things that never work?

Yes! My ears were like Dumbo. Tell me!

He says, we think we know the reason. It’s because of the other person.

I am mad at you because of what you did. If you haven’t done it I wouldn’t be mad.

Yes, exactly. That is how I feel.

Then he said something I never expected.

It is not about them It’s all about us.

We get angry because we don’t feel enough real love.

What is REAL LOVE?

Real love is I care about your happiness without wanting anything from you in return.

Real love is not  I do what  you want and you like me.

Real love is when I am stupid, when I screw up, when I’m in your way , and you don’t feel irritated and disappointed  with me.

That’s very hard! 

He said, since  we were children, when we are quiet, obedient, doing all the right thing, they will smile at us and speak gently.

However, when we make a lot of noise, fight with brothers, bring a bad grade, then there was no smile.

That taught us a lesson. When you are good I love you but when you are not , I don’t.

 

 

 When we get angry we can always find something about them that is wrong and find things that we are right.

Would you rather be happy or right?

I stopped,  thought, and replyed. 

I want to be happy. I want to have more real love in my life.

So whenever I was getting angry, I admitted I was wrong.

It was difficult but there was always someting to improve in my side. 

I started to talk more gently, I started to be more patient. 

Ladies and gentlemen, that was the moment  Unhappy Angry Martha decided to become Happy Loving Martha.

My life changed since then.

Real love is caring about others without wanting anything from them in return.

Do you want to be happy or right?

Because most of the time you can only choose one of them.